While I know it past, I didn’t have time to write. But Happy Easter. Days like this remind me how blessed I am. I know times get tough, but for some reason I always seem to get through. I’m blessed to have family, friends, and god always at my side guiding me where I need to be. Dancing is going great and a huge dance is coming up soon and I’m so excited. My little brother goes back to school again and soon he will graduate from high school. I can’t believe it. He has gone through Chemotherapy, a bone marrow transplant, and a double lung transplant in his lifetime. His strength shows me the miracles this world still holds and I’m blessed to see it everyday. When I can finally get my fat ass into shape I will leave for the Navy, and I know that in itself will be quite the journey. While I may still struggle with things time to time. I thank god each day, since each day is a blessing.
Our world is full of many different people. Many things make us different from our clothes, race, color, beliefs, and so forth. But with this many things one thing is certain that People will always see things differently. One side vs another. People fight amount each other for various reason because of petty differences such as sexual orientation, political party we prefer, and so on. I have been in the dance scene for a while and by this I mean social partner dancing. But I realize more and more how much dancing unifies all of us.
There is always gonna be hateful people who are racist and whatnot. But I love how during the dancing scene for a few minutes during a song two people can randomly dance with each other and put all differences aside. My days in the dancing scene has exposed me to some of the most diverse friends I have ever had in life and I’m so thankful for them each day. It makes me realize that something as dancing can help this world grow closer together. Dancing is a universal language and while there are many forms it is all the same no matter where you are from. I guess that’s what makes dancing so special. That for a few moments we are not about, black, white, gay, straight, etc. but we are all dancers dancing for the fun and love of it.
Sometimes in life you find yourself on repeat; that could be good or bad, but in this case I’d rather not be in this repetitive cycle I have found myself in. Our emotions mess with us and I know I let mine get the better of me all the time. It’s the same story, fall for the girl only to never make it and find myself tumbling back down to the bottom yet again. An endless cycle that I have been stuck in for the past few years. We say that our past can teach us to learn from our mistakes, but it seems I have yet to learn anything since I find myself in the same position yet again. I know I am much stronger than before, in the past it would ruin me and I would just let myself go. I remember I fell out of it so bad that I quit dancing for quite sometime upon other things. The heart wants what it wants and if it knows It can’t have something well then our minds’ can easily play tricks on us. I know I feel myself slipping a little, and I’m already skipping out on dancing and leaving early, but your mind does that too you. Perhaps I may just take a break until the Dance-a-thon, I think I can really recover there. I know I have old friends coming down to dance and they could be the medicine I really need to get back on track. I like hiding emotions and not really talking about things to people, but sometimes you want to spill everything to someone. I know I shouldn’t be too hard on myself, but sometimes we can’t help it ya know. All I know is I’m tired of this cycle, Perhaps a week of concentrating on music, going to the gym and just isolating myself will help me recollect my thoughts. Until then I think I’m gonna try something new.
It is hard to be happy all the time. Maintaining it depends on many variables from relationship status, to mood, fund, to anything really. But holding onto is is the tricky part. It is like trying to hold on to air; the minute you feel like you have a grasp on it; it slips away. Some better than others can maintain it more than others and others well they just can’t seem to catch a break. While for the most part I feel like I have a good grab on it, there is always a sense of me missing something. I feel like I’m always close to obtaining what I desire most but for some reason I decide to let it slip. The last bit that would complete me continues to elude me. I know one day I’ll shall obtain it, but I’d rather have at least a taste of the sweet victory rather than later. But How can I breathe with no air? yes i just quoted a song. But it’s kinda true. Happiness is like air and its hard to hold onto. and we need air to breathe and live. It’s a matter of patience and learning to figure out how to hold onto something that cannot by physically touched is the tricky part.
Open session for a day. Ask me a question and i will answer it maybe. Lol
It really makes my day even after all these years when random people take the time to compliment my dancing. Even after all these years people still do it. I know I’m not the best, and I’m not trying to be. I’m pretty sure I’ve been dancing at the same level for a while now. But despite where I am, even if it’s in a dancing venue or somewhere more exposed to the general public, someone always takes the time to approach me and compliment me. That makes my day, because all I try to do is have fun and hope to inspire others. Even other dancers whom I consider better take time to still compliment me. I just know after all these years it still bring a smile to my face.